Today on our lunch break, my husband and I were musing about fan fiction. Well, actually it started out as him telling me about a dream he had last night that involved a new Metal Gear Solid game in which Snake gets a new suit that lets him jump really high (and gives him glowing, yellow butterfly wings during the jump – hello Bayonetta!).
So. I was suggesting that maybe Snake really COULD get a suit like that, in one of the future installments of the series. He thought some of my ideas were too ridiculous (as he often does), so I said perhaps this could be a MGS fan fiction instead of an actual game. (Spoilers ahead, sorry.)
Metal Gear Solid: Still Solid
2213 AD. Snake found a way to inject himself with the nanomachines that basically made Vamp immortal, and so now he’s going to live forever (duh) and this is why he’s still around like 200 years later. In this future, they’ve invented a new kind of octo-camo that they call mirror-camo. Instead of just making Snake look like stuff, it goes one step further and actually mimics the target of Snake’s choice.
Okay, so like, remember those flying enemy things in MGS4? Me too. Whereas back in the 21st century Snake had to shoot them from afar, NOW he has mirror-camo that actually lets him copy them and then HE can fly too. (Isn’t Snake the coolest?)
And Otacon! Naturally, they’ve found a way to preserve someone by storing their brain in a jar, right? So Otacon still exists in brain form, and he follows Really Old Snake around with the Mark 500, which he controls with his brain from inside a jar (which just kinda sits on the desk in their spaceship! which he also controls from his brain).
Oh, but every fanfic has to have some sort of romance, right? So somewhere down the line, Otacon figured out how to clone Naomi, kinda like how they cloned Big Boss with Les Enfants Terribles, only this is more like Les Enfants Secret or whatever. And so he made a new Naomi so they could finally be together, yay! Only once she realizes he’s just a brain in a jar, she’s not attracted to him anymore and then he’s just sad all the time. Oh and she gets pissed at Snake for using her immortality nanomachines and then she becomes their next villain.
Also, something to do with Metal Gear, somewhere in there. And Raiden makes an appearance and there are many scenes involving his exceptionally muscular cyborg thighs.
What do you think? Yes, no?
Okay, I found this so amusing (and I admit that I may be the only one, but whatever) that I’ve decided to post the rest later. Kind of like a new series (!) on my new blog! I just know you’re eagerly awaiting the next one.